2007 ----- 2008

Once I read a quote by a famous movie star. He said “I feel surprised how people celebrate birthdays while in fact they lost a year from their life”. Although I don’t agree with him completely but I cant deny that he is right. He just looks to the empty half of the glass.

Its already more than three years and a half had passed since the MNF invaded Iraq. I don’t how long they intend to stay but they already lost three years and 9 months. 45 months passed without real progress. 45 months passed without achieving the main goal of the invasion, creating a democratic Iraq.

45 months passed without fulfilling the minimum level of the Iraqis needs. We have electricity for less than two hours a day. We never stop using the water pump because we would never have water without it. The administrational corruption reached the top to the extent that it became the rule, no one can finish any work in the governmental establishment without paying a bribe to that or this employee. The most important thing that both the American and Iraqi governments failed to achieve is security. They failed because they couldn’t persuade Iraqis that they came to help them. Now, we live in the middle of unannounced civil war. I agree that there is a reduction in the killing cases but its not because the Iraqi security forces and the MNF succeeded in settling security, No. Its just because the neighborhoods of Baghdad had changed completely. Now we have Shiite neighborhoods and Sunni neighborhoods and there is an ongoing fight in the mixed areas which reflect the real security situation. Until today, Shiite people feel afraid of going to or even passing through Sunni neighborhoods and it’s the same for Sunni people who feel terrified if they have to go or to pass through Shiite neighborhoods.

Its only few hours left until we say goodbye 2007 and hello 2008. I have big hopes and wishes but my biggest wish is that all the politicians all over the world realize that the we are all the same (the citizens and the politicians who rule the countries in the oppressed countries especially in my wounded Iraq) and we all having the same feelings and needs.

Happy New Year Everyone.

One year ago today

Picking up the news paper I saw the strangest headline of all.

"The Ministry of Electricity announces that the hours of lack of electricity will be increased as a result of scarcity of fuel and some technical issues."

This is something I cannot understand. How less electricity?? How fuel scarcity??

We have one hour of electricity in every twelve - How can it be less? And how in any scenario could there be a scarcity of fuel in Iraq ? !

We have despaired of warm homes.

We have despaired of hot water.

We have forgotten how to sit relaxed in our homes. I walk into the living room looking for my son and couldn't find him. I looked for him in the other rooms, but he was nowhere to be seen.

I called out for my daughter and asked her whether she knew where he was - but no luck.

"WHERE ARE YOU ! !"

In my room, the mound moves, and from under four blankets put there to go to the cleaners emerges a face with still-asleep eyes - IT IS HE ! ! "What are you doing there under those blankets? I went crazy with worry looking for you!", "Oh, mum, I just wanted to revise my computer skills exam in comfort, but I fell asleep." Getting up and pulling the blankets to one side, I saw that he had my laptop, a plate of nuts, a can of juice and his fresh-from-the-apple-store in LA-ipod with ear plugs still plugged in, underneath.

Is this sweet?? Or is it really sooo sad? But more important - Why is it like this? Countries march forward - why have we been forced back into the pre-electricity age?

And more important still - WHERE IS OUR OIL GOING? In five years, couldn't the government crawl back to square one? To zero? To what the tyrant used to give us?

Saddam was executed one year ago today - I wonder how many people who condemned him during his rule would give their fingers to go back in time. And how many people who thought that a foreign power would be the answer - regret that too.

Difficult mission

One week ago, we started work of the end year story that we share the work together. Sunni journalist took the Sunni neighborhoods and Shiite journalist took the Shiite neighborhoods. I was excite to do this story. I had to visit one family in each of mine neighborhood, I mean the Shiite majority neighborhood. But when I started my trip to do my job I faced so many difficulties not because the fears of the militias or terrorist.The difficulty was that most people feel afraid from the journalist and they deal with them as spies who work to serve the interest of their enemies. Some times, people refuse to cooperate and wonder about the benefit they will gain if they talk to a journalist.

“If we talk,will that change our miserable reality?” that what Iraqis always ask about.

New Baghdad one of the mixed neighborhoods so to get more benefit for our story I should talk to Christian person to ask him or her about the security in the neighborhood. As usual I couldn’t stop someone in the street to talk to because this thing can be done only in Democrat countrie not Iraq. So I phoned my Christian friend who guided me to her grandmother to interview her.

When I talked to the old lady, I felt that the woman was doubtful about my intention. I hardly convince her that my story talks about the changes that happened in Iraq through 2007. Then I talked to her about many stuff in her neighborhood. She was very kind and generous woman and she was very accurate in her describtion for her neighborhood, she showed me a perfect image about her neighborhood.

Next day my friend  phoned me to ask about the kind of conversation that I took part with her grandmother.

“it was about the security situation in the neighborhood” I answered.

She said,” my grandmother doesn’t feel comfortable she is afraid that conversation will bring troubles for her”

“Why? she did not say anything may cause troubles” I replied.

“Please Jenan don’t use this conversation in your story ... That what my grandmother wants”

“Ok dear I will not, don’t worry”. Oh God why people are terrified from journalists. We try to help our country by showing the truth no more, no less.

At this moment I realized new difficulties that are facing the journalists in Iraq. Not only the terrorism but also people who dont no trust journalism as a fourth authority also they don’t believe that it has the ability to change because of what they have seen during the former regime and what they see with the current regime. On contrary they afraid may we hurt them if we publish their opinion about what is happening in Iraq.

Wedding party

Thursday afternoon I was invited to attend a wedding party of one of my cousins’ which is something ordinary, but the wedding party which is in Jihad neighborhood is the extraordinary one.

This neighborhood is so dangerous to go to or to pass through a month ago for more than one year as a result of the sectarian violence, but things change in Baghdad including Jihad neighborhood. I really went there before the wedding party last Tuesday to cover a story of the security situation in 2007 ,but it took me only 30 minutes of being there having the good impression and encouragement to attend the coming party . The ceremony of the wedding started at the bridegroom’s house without the bride of course as she is still at her mother’s house, the bride’s father was killed during the first gulf war in 1984, having the mother raised her two daughters .At 3.30 pm the convoy of the wedding headed by the bridegroom's car (9 cars) sat out to Turath neighborhood where the bride's house is to bring her to her husband's house at Jihad. The great thing is the tour we made to back and forth to the bridegroom's house. We passed through Jihad, BIAP route, Amil, Bayaa, Risala and Turath neighborhoods. All these areas where so dangerous to pass through in the very near time ,but thanks Allah they became so safe to have this wedding party and to attend it to share them the happiness we all have.

Our tour lasted less than two hours and we came back to Jihad again at the sunset bringing the bride to her bridegroom's house or nest. After that the wedding party started with simple celebration and traditions. The guests were from different parts from Baghdad including me and, despite the fun we had in this party, we were thinking in difficulties we might face in our way back homes in Baghdad's darkness.

We convinced our host to leave the party at 9 p.m .We were 5 families of about 25 members with four cars. Leaving the house at such a time few months ago with such a number of cars means a suicide attempt. First, the gunmen and criminals were waiting for bait like this to have this number in that time. On the other hand, even the American forces and the Iraqi ones would suspect having 4 cars in darkness with many passengers in who might take the bad idea and deal with them from that point. Away from all these bad things, we reached our homes with happiness on our faces on the situation we have. I just want to ask what happened during the last few months to make the situation be better than the past .If the American and the Iraqi forces have a role in this , the question will be " Why did it take more than four years to have a situation like this? ". I just want to add " Do the Iraqi people deserve to live in happiness or no? And for how long? ". I can’t describe my happiness in that wedding party which was so great. Even the bridegroom himself couldn’t believe having his wedding as it had one year of delay due to the security situation and deceased uncle. The wonderful happiness was in the children’s faces that were so happy to play with each other, have what ever they want from food, cake, coke and chocolate, but the amazing thing is to have the night tour without their parents’ complain. Is this happiness too much for Iraqis to have after all these of misery?

Merry Christmas

This is to wish every one a Merry Christmas and happy New Year.

Wish you peace.

Friendly argument

We have a proverb that says "a broken heart can’t be mended" and that is what I experienced yesterday when I was going back home.

I hired a taxi and the taxi driver was asking me about the road that we have to go through. I told him about my daily route and he said "its too far man. Why don't we go through the airport street through Adil?". I was like "what! No way man, I still need my life".

He said " calm down man. I'm a Shiite guy and I have been there about two hours ago." I answered him "well, its up to you because its your life but for me, I have a son to live for". After he accepted to go through the street I chose, we found a very bad traffic then he said "Is this the smooth street you told me about?" I told him "at least its safe" and that was the point when the politics talk started.

He said " people now started fighting Al Qaida and they are awakened now. They formed awakening council in many Sunni neighborhoods including Adil"

I laughed sarcastically and said "why are they awakened? Were they sleeping when Al Qaida killed thousands of innocent people?"

At that point, I can say the political struggle started. We argued for about 30 minutes. After a long fight, we agreed on one point. We agreed that so many promises were made by the American administration and by the Iraqi government - so many promises that were never fulfilled. 

He started laughing and said "I feel so sorry because I participated in the election. I though that Saddam's days were over but now I feel sorry because we have many small Saddams who were brought by the USA. The old Saddam had been kicked out by the Americans but who will help us to end the days of the new Saddams if the USA keeps supporting them".

I didn't answer him because I couldn't find an answer.

Teachers' strike

For the first time, teachers feel that their union has remembered its staff and it starts working for them.

The teachers' union called for a strike two weeks ago to be for one simple day put Sunday 16th of this recent month as a start demanding all teachers of the fifteen Iraqi provinces ( without the other three provinces in Kurdistan region in the north of Iraq) to take part in it. As this step is for the benefit of them , teachers of Basra, Anbar , Mosul , Baghdad and the other provinces in the south , west , east and centre of Iraq carried  it out hoping to get its result so soon.

The aim of this strike is to make those teachers of the south and centre of Iraq in a balance with those teachers in Kurdistan region by having the same salaries and privilege. Teachers in Kurdistan get double and they reach triple the salaries of those in all over the country. The question is why we have this double standard in dealing with teachers.

Are the teachers in Kurdistan better than those in other parts of Iraq? Are they suffer or face more difficulties to be compensated? Does the education system differ in a way which forces the teachers to give more efforts? Do teachers have to travel so far of their homes to get extra money for transportation? The answer is so simple: NO. I can tell after having thirteen years of experience in teaching that teachers in the south had suffered a lot during Saddam regime.

Kurd teachers didn't suffer as much as those teachers in the marshes or the desert or even in the cites. We know that they suffered during Saddam's regime or of the previous regimes. But teachers in other parts and especially in the south suffered more than that. In the past, I had to teach in two different schools in one salary of about three dollars a month. Nowadays my colleagues get about 125 $ per month spending at least 50 $ on transportation.

So to be equal in suffering for all those years, Iraqi teachers should be equal in having their salaries whether they are in the north or in the south of Iraq.

For my opinion , the union has the right to do this strike passing its opinion to the central government that Kurdistan region which gets its fund from you is treating teachers in a way or another better than you with the money of those teachers' lands. For example, Basra and Maysan provinces are the richest in oil in Iraq. Basra produces oil which Iraqi budget depends for paying Iraqi people salaries and fund ministries while its teachers get salaries of (190 $) to (450 $) per month. Their counterparts in Kurdistan get (450 $) to (1200 $).

I think the union in this democratic step is showing the progress the Iraqi teachers reach which reflect the future of the Iraqi society. The strike doesn't stop at this point . The union will wait for the government reply till January the second if not teachers will stop teaching for a week and if reaching no goal the schools will close their doors in the mid year examinations.

The first tour

Yesterday morning I made a tour to different areas in Baghdad which I would never think or dream to pass through a year ago.

I didn’t mean to make this trip, but I had an appointment with my sister and her husband to go to the main directorate of passports in east Baghdad at Risafa bank. I live in Amil neighborhood in the south west of Baghdad at Karkh bank while my sister and her husband who don’t have a car live at Ameriyah neighborhood in the west bank

So I, with my brother, the driver, have to pick them up from there to go to our final destination in Rusafa bank.

The great thing is that my brother decided to take the highway that joins my neighborhood with Ameriyah through Ja’amia and Khadra’a neighborhoods which were with Ameriyah the main bases for Qaeda and terrorists till the beginning of this year.

I was really afraid to go there having an option to take a long way through another neighborhood, but we have our sister to pick up and the steering wheel wasn’t in my hand so my brother was more courageous than me to take this decision.

To my surprise, I saw the highway full with traffic having cars of all kinds’ even trailers comparing it with the last few months which was almost deserted of all kinds of cars even the military ones. I am really happy to see and feel the security situation becomes better and better.

I also starts thinking of taking this route to go to the Kadhemiyah shrine which let me reach it within ten minutes while I have to spend at least one hour if I want to go Kadhemiyah neighborhood taking another long route to avoid the danger I may face taking the original route.

As you know we had many people who were killed in this route as victims of the sectarian violence for the last three years.I really hope and pray to have this peace for the good.

A trip to Fallujah

I will make this as short as possible.

On Monday the trip from Baghdad to Fallujah was peaceful, quick and no troubles of any kind. The taxi driver lost three of his uncles in Baghdad.

I don’t recall talking to any one who didn’t suffer losing a relative or a son. So any way I am home after sunset and every thing went so peaceful.

On Tuesday the Fallujah stringer and I in the city, Jamal, tried to talk to many officials and tribal sheikhs but we couldn’t. It was an odd experiment was for the first time I enjoyed the capability to identify myself as a journalist without fear. It was unique moments.

For the first time I see a gathering of journalists in Fallujah saying with no fear they work for foreign news agencies.

It was happy moments to be able to tour Fallujah and talk to everyone as a reporter seeking for the truth.

Any way on the way back yesterday, it was different.

The first route was blocked by an American military convoy. The driver decided this would take a long time and turned back to another route.

Ahead of us there was another military convoy, also American, driving slowly, and stopped random cars on the other side of the street and this took more than an hour.

Any way the convoy left the highway to a near by guarding post of the Iraqi police.

Passed Abu Ghraib prison, our least favorite scene, I avoid looking at it. Driving about 90 miles per hour an Iraqi humvee came from no where, we couldn’t stop and the driver had to pass the humvee as he couldn’t stop to avoid collision.

Few minutes later as we approached an Iraqi army check point soldiers pointed their new M16 rifles and shouted Enzil (get down) and ran to the car and took us all down. The humvee suspected the car to be a car bomb or transporting weapons.

The soldiers were shouting and opening the doors of the car. They got on their knees, aiming their weapons. We were frightened, we know their lack of discipline.

We were taken aside and a soldier drove the car away, minutes passed and soldiers searched us and the car. The soldiers apologized and we moved on. No big deal.

I will not talk about the conversations that we had to make in every single check point (more than eight) and answering the stupid questions like (Where are you coming from? Where are you heading to?).

Why it is stupid? Because it is a highway and if the soldiers want to secure the area what difference does it make if I was coming from X city and heading to Y neighborhood. On the highway we pass Abu Ghraib, Garma, Nasr and Salam and other areas, I can say I am coming from Garma or even from Ramadi, Syrian or Jordanian borders and no one can say no. It is the route that everyone has to take.

I can say I am heading to Sadr city or Ameriyah and no one can object because it is the route that I have to take to go to these areas, it is a high way that leads to Baghdad. They can search the car and then say: You are good to go. But they never do and it is annoying to answer these stupid questions in every check point.

Any way in Al Mansour I took another taxi to the office and this time a different story.

The young taxi driver was seeking for a job for the last two years, as he said. Finally someone offered him to get him a job for $100 bribe and he paid. The officials in the ministry that got him his job asked them to swear that they didn’t pay money to get appointed.

He along with others refused to do so and some of the young men identified the officials they bribed. High ranking officers, body guards and employees who were surrounding the deputy minister who was talking to the new employees. Others couldn’t identify as they paid the money through a third party.

He says it is a good thing what they did but they and I know no actions will be taken to the corrupted employee unless it was over politics, he said.

He was thinking out loud all the way what he can do to get a job without paying the money.

Finally I arrived to the office before sunset and the phone rang, a friend of mine. She was complaining that a friend I know applied to a job in the Green Zone through someone I know (I know in person the man who asked this) and he is refusing to give the job unless the girl agrees to be his girl friend but she is refusing any one of us to interfere.

So men cannot get a job unless they pay money and girls cannot get the job unless they are …

Let there be light

This is the very last time I will attempt this, I say to myself as I drive towards the checkpoint. If they won’t let me through this time, I will give up the idea of going home.

The problem, of course is that they are afraid of the idea of letting the generator through the checkpoint. I have been trying for two weeks.

“We don’t know what’s inside it. Get us a letter from the local council.” And off I go to the local council. “Is it a very big generator? Why are the soldiers so reluctant to let it in? There must be something wrong. But we can’t vouch for your generator – how could we?” No it isn’t a big generator. It’s like the wheelbarrow you use in the garden. So I let it go for another couple of days

And now, here goes.

“Assalamu Alaykum. I took my generator to be repaired and I want to take it home now. Can we pass?”

This is a new soldier, I haven’t seen him before. “Is it big?”, “No, there, you can see it in the pickup truck behind me.”

He looks at me very suspiciously then walks off to take a look. “OK. But you must get us a letter from the owner” That’s easy! I am the owner. I took out my ever ready notebook and pen. “I am the owner. What shall I say?”, “No. Not from you. From the owner.”. “I am the owner. What do you want me to write?”, “NO. NO. NOT FROM YOU – FROM THE OWNER”, “I AM THE OWNER!!”.. .

He looks baffled. “Then get me a letter from the fitter who repaired it.” He was so fresh from the back of nowhere that he could not conceive of a generator being owned by a woman. What to do now?

I ring my nephew. I had wanted him to stay clear of the generator; he was driving several cars behind me. I give him specific instructions, and wink in the phone. He comes.

“Assalamu Alaykum. How are you doing, my cousin? What about my generator, my aunt says there are problems …”, “Oh, the generator, is it yours? No, not really, we just can’t let it through without a letter from the owner that’s all. And your aunt here, the Hijiya, doesn’t seem to understand.”,

“Never mind, my cousin, you know how it is … (making a face and rolling up his eyes). This is my ID, keep it with you until I install the generator and come out. Come with me if you like, and after you are sure that I have taken the generator to my house, you can give it back to me.”

“No, no. This letter is enough. Yalla, go through.”

I was so intent on my own business; I hadn’t noticed that more than fifty cars had piled up behind me blocking the road. Oh no! Flushed faces – angry eyes, but no one out of their car to fight – yet. “Quickly, Hammoudi – lets go!” And we drive off.

And today there shall be light in my home – again.

Thanx Allah

For those who doesn’t believe in God (Allah), I have some evidences that our mighty creator is everywhere.

When I see the chaos in the Iraqis streets and when I see that the traffic police can do nothing with the crazy Iraqi drivers, I know that Allah gives some of them patience to bear the craziness of the majority of them.

When I see the Iraqis security useless check points which don’t even check one car correctly, I feel Allah existence everywhere and Im get sure that he protects us with his great power.

When I see my family, all of them (more than 11 members)gather around one kerosene heater and they are all satisfied and don’t feel cold, I get sure that Allah help us by putting Iraq in such place on earth where we don’t have snow in winter because we would be all dead.

Then I see the failure in electricity that lasts for about twenty hours a day, I feel that Allah love us because we are not that type of people who care about staying awake all the night to watch TV.

When I watch the Iraqi parliament sessions and I see how the members fight each other, I know that Allah is everywhere because if there is not Allah, they would all say that they are gods.

And at last, when I see the biggest force on earth unable to control a small city like Baghdad, I know Allah is everywhere because without his great will, people would start killing each other any moment.

There are too many evidences of Allah existence but I don’t have enough time to count them all because I may spend all my life counting. For those who never believe in God, I say come to Iraq and you would be good belivers.

God blessing

In many ways if I think of our life in Iraq I will find that we live with God blessing…..Yes every thing in earth depend on God blessing but with people effort…..in Iraq the effort of people is limited.

I think you heard about Cholera infections in Iraq. If you read the statistics you will be astonished that this wounded country is able to withstand in front of this outbreak disease in spite of all the problems that surround it. When this disease showed for the first time in north of Iraq I thought that this disease will spread in our country like the fire spread in dry stalks.

Yesterday I heard about family from the province of Baghdad who hided their diseased aunt in her room and did not take her to hospital because they consider that shameful. Her nephew said, “They will put her under quarantine in hospital…that is shame on our family, we are tribal society”. This family was afraid that society will blame them if they take her to hospital and leave her alone in quarantine. This woman died after three days of her infection. I think she died because the stupid fears of blames not because the infection of Cholera that if they treat her immediately may be she would still alive and also take her to hospital would protect many persons from infection.

From knowing the nature of the society in this area because I know many people who live there I'm almost sure there will be tens of similar cases. And you can count how many persons around those diseased people may carry the infection to other people…..really we live with God blessing only, don’t we?

The last tour

More than four years ago some of my friends and I agreed that what would happen might change Baghdad's face forever and I suggested driving through Baghdad's streets for the last time few days before the invasion started. Every one agreed and other friends brought a mini bus and invited other friends and it became more like tourist's tour.

Today I am convinced that the last tour decision was the best decision at that time. Baghdad was not the perfect place and was not paradise but it was better than now.

I saw for the last time Baghdad but it was then filled with fear and families leaving prior to war, men in uniforms in intersection preparing to war, trenches, shops owners closing their shops to leave but never the less it was the last time that I travel in Baghdad without fear of a fake checkpoint with gunmen to ask me Sunni or Shiite?The last time I see Baghdad ruled by a dictator and now I see Baghdad ruled by jungle law (if there is difference).

It was the last time that I see Baghdad's face not stained with blood as obvious as now.

To the most beautiful woman, to you Baghdad: your men are captivated by your love, love them back as you always did.